Funny Job Titles :: Phlebotomist

Some job titles just have a funny ring to them. For example, I would never be a “phlebotomist”. The name alone makes me giggle. I wouldn’t be able to hold a straight face any time I said it. Imagine being at a party (in screenplay format):

Stranger
So, what do you do?
Me
I’m a… well… a phlebotomist.
Stranger
Eh, a what?
Me
A phlebotomist.
Stranger
I see. Is that related to botany?
Me
No. It’s…
Stranger
Wait! Don’t tell me. A person that works with
the throat? You know, because of phlem?
Me
No, not even close. It’s phlebotomist.
p-h-l-e-B-o-t-o…
Stranger
Phleboto? Phleboto? Wait, I remember now…
It was my trip to the tropics.
Me
Tropics?
Stranger
Yes. I remember now. Phleboto, phleboto…
Phlebotomus! Yes, that’s it!
Me
No, that’s not…
Stranger
Yes, yes it is. Clear as day. Phlebotomus,
man-biting sandflies! Nasty little buggers.
Got me all over. Had me itching in places
I normally wouldn’t talk about.
Me
Yes, well, I’m sorry to hear about that.
Stranger
Yeah, you’re a bug person! Wow, what a unique job.
So, can you help me with the itching? I could
show you the bites.
Me
Er, um, no.

 


11 responses

  1. Larry Avatar

    Even before I knew what it meant I always hated the word “phlebotomist”. It sounded like phlem which in turn reminded me of a bad morning I once had.
    Larry
    DamnIneedAjob.com

  2. yaua Avatar
    yaua

    Apologies. The rest of the site looks amazing and is a great read. The above comment was soley directed at this page.
    Merry Christmas!

  3. yaua Avatar
    yaua

    Jee, no-one visits this site, hmmm i wonder why?
    Maybe someone will tell when they visit in two months time.
    Really cool site though.

  4. yaua Avatar
    yaua

    Chuck, you can get tablets to ease those sort of thoughts you know.
    Interesting article and contributions though.

  5. chuck Avatar
    chuck

    lets all slit our wrists now? yer?

  6. David Simoni Avatar
    David Simoni

    I like Robert Fulghum’s job title. It changes depending on whom he’s talking to on a long flight. When asked: “What do you do?” he will sometimes respond, “I’m a Respirateur” leading people to guess what he does. Finally he tells them what it means: he’s a breather. He does that more than anything else after all. Fulghum is the author of All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten.

  7. Hans Avatar

    Heh heh… Poor “Ali J” is having a tough time as a phlebotomist :’)

  8. Ali J Avatar

    this isn’t funny, it sucks

  9. Magster Avatar
    Magster

    Actually, when you tell someone you are a phlebotomist, they usually associate the word with “labotomy.” Then when you do tell them what the word means, they look at you like you’re a freak!!

  10. g Avatar
    g

    Phlebotomists collect blood samples and body fluids from patients for laboratory testing.

  11. moe Avatar
    moe

    what the hel are u on about

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